Fishin stories

            Every fisherman and or woman has a story or stories that they like to tell. I have some favorites I like to tell and so does my dad. Dad’s favorite is the tale of the patient splake which always goes like this.

 One time me and joe where out here drinking having a good time and we went out to check our traps and Joe yelled “ Jeff come see this shit.”  And I walked over to his trap looked down the hole and saw the biggest friggin’ splake you evah seen. That fish was just waiting there staring at that shiner pectoral fins just barely moving. So we waited for a while and it still didn’t move so we went back to the truck and watched. Half an hour past the fish still didn’t take the bait and it never did until Joe went over and jigged the fish a little. And that splake chomped on that fish and took off and as soon as Joe got the splake to the hole it spit the hook out. Then a little later I went to check one of my holes and there that splake was just eyeballing my bait. So I said screw it and left[S1]   if it wanted my bait it’ll take it. But it never did even as I was pullin that trap up that splake just watched my bait.

My favorite story is the usual the big one that got away. So my grandfather and I where on silver lake in our usual spot we were just about to give up and I got a flag. So I walked over to the trap expecting it to be just a wind flag but that thing was turning like crazy. I got exited so I tried to huss that thing out of the hole. Which would’ve been fine had the fish not been the biggest bass in all the land. That fish had to have almost three feet long and it got stuck sideways in the hole. As I reached down to grab it she got free and swam away.

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Digging

     

            Over the summer I had nothing to do so my dad made me go digging with him. What did we go digging for? Worms, big ol’ sandworms in the mudflats. Usually I’d tell you how to do something like a pro but I suck at digging.

Any way’s dad came to pick up at four in the morning to go down to the coast to dig. After a long drive we finally made it to the perfect place to go digging. When we got there we met some guy who dad called butterball and two other people who I will call dubah’s. After I was introduced and stuff I got my crotch boot’s on and got a clamming hoe and descended to the mudflat.

After dad taught me how to flip the mud over and keep my hole clean and how not to be a bitch about mud he left. After a couple of minutes I had gotten ten worms and I heard people giggling like little girl’s. I looked up and see the dubah’s throwing mud at each other and dad helping butter ball who had gotten stuck in the mud. Another half hour had gone by I realized someone else was also hunting for worm’s. It was a little mud crab and chopped one of my worms in half and ate it. So in return I chucked him at butterball which scared him so much he fell butt first in the mud and got stuck.

As we were trying to help butterball up out of the mud we realized the tide was coming in. Now it’s in these situations you realize who you’re friends are and butterball had none. We helped him get upright then left him ball’s deep in mud to go clean the mud off our boots and leave. While we were cleaning our stuff we looked back to see butterball a three hundred pound man running through the mud with no boot’s on and the tide right behind him.

 

 

How to hunt like a pro

            Huntin is another favored past time of Maine and my second favorite past time. If you’re not me you probably don’t which end of the gun to use but I’m going to make you an MLG hunter.

           

            First thing you need is a high powered rifle in which to shoot with. You don’t need a gun that’s going to blow the deer’s tits apart just make them dead. I use a .308 Remington which isn’t the biggest tool in the she gets the job done. When you get your gun you gotta sight it in so you can hit whatevah it is you’re huntin. Remember when you sight it in it doesn’t have to be spot just consistent where it hit’s

 

            Secondly you need a place to hunt like a field or somewhere in the woods. I personally like fields the best because deer love them and you can see the deer. For a forest it’s best to find a place with a logging road so there are clear patches to set up in. The secret third option is heater hunting also known as trolling is where you cruise around in your truck. While this is technically illegal it is very warm so just make sure no one’s around if you shoot out of your window. But legally you have to step ten or so feet of the road to make it legal.

 

            Lastly just be prepared with a pee bottle and food. For a pee bottle always bring a Gatorade or Powerade bottle unless you have great aim. For food bring donut holes for in the truck and a granola bar or something similar for the tree stand. Also dress warm it’s always cold and when you sit motionless for about four to five hours it gets wicked cold.